Here is how it went.
Q: Are you gay?
A: Yes
Q: Why did you choose to be gay?
A: I didn't choose to be gay, I was born gay.
Q: What do you mean, born gay? How are you born gay?
A: I was attracted to men since I was 7 years old?
Q: But children before puberty are not sexual, so how were you 'sexually' attracted to men at the age of 7?
A: Well, I met that I was always attracted to men since I can remember.
Q: OK, so you were 'attracted to men, but you can't say you were always 'sexually' attracted to men, right?
A: Right, but I am sexually attracted to men.
Q: Are you sexually attracted to all men?
A: I like masculine men with nice bodies, that's just what I like.
Q: So you are not attracted to men like yourself?
A: Yes, I said masculine men, but maybe more built than I am.
Q: Do you date men often?
A: Not too many guys want to date, they just want to have sex and then you don't see them again?
Q: So do you have sex with guys instead of dates?
A: Well, most of the time. Thats really all that happens. Sometimes we become friends for a while, but mostly it's about the hook-up.
Q: Do you want to actually date other guys?
A: Yes, but the guys I want to date, don't want to date. They want to have sex.
Q: Do you look at porn or go to gay sex sites?
A: Yes, porn is my date most of the time, and the gay sex sites is where I meet most of the guys I try to date.
Q: But you never really have a date, just a sex hook-up, right?
A: Right.
Q: Do you masturbate much?
A: A couple times a day. I am always horny.
Q: So what do you think about when masturbating?
A: Those hot masculine muscular guys I like.
Q: Are these the same masculine and more muscular guys in the porn and that you find on the gay sex sites you see all the time?
A: Yes. Those are the guys I like.
Q: So how many times do you think you masturbate thinking about those guys?
A: About 15 to 20 times a week
Q: So how much time do you think you spend watching porn or on line at sex sites?
A: Oh wow....about 3 or 4 hours a most nights.
Q: That's about 20 hours a week.
A: Wow, yeah, I guess it is. Wow, never thought about it that way.
Q: What do you do for fun?
A: I work out 3 days a week, watch movies, go to the park, go out to eat, and go to the clubs every once in a while. I don't really like the clubs, but I go when I get bored or with a friend.
Q: So do you have many friends, or guys you would call friends?
A: Well, maybe one, but most of the guys I know are acquaintances.
Q: Is it hard for you to make friends?
A: Well, most gay guys only want to be your friend, if you are someone they want to have sex with.
Q: Is that what you do?
A: Not all the time, but I guess so since I don't have anything in common with feminine guys, so I just look for the masculine guys who are athletic.
Q: So is it just wanting to have sex with other guys, what makes you gay?
A: Well, I am attracted to men more than I am attracted to women.
Q: So you are attracted to women?
A: I dated girls a while back, but haven't dated a women in years.
Q: So what made you stop dating women and choose to date only men?
A: I was just more attracted to other men.
Q: Masculine and more muscular men
A: Yeah, because that's what I like.
Q: So do you think all the masturbation, like 20 times a week, to those more masculine and more muscular body images had anything to do with you becoming more attracted to men than women?
A: Interesting....well, that could have something to do with it.
Q: Plus over 20 yours of gay porn on top of that?
A: I never thought about it that way. I guess that is kind of alot of masturbating and porn.
Q: Now I am not saying you were never attracted to other men, but do you think all the porn and masturbation helped you feel like you were more attracted to other men? Or more specifically masculine men with more muscular bodies than your own?
A: That's something I need to think about. But that's what it sounds like.
Q: Would you like to be able to have a stable relationship with a man or women, if you found someone you were compatable with?
A: Well never thought about having another relationship with a women, but I would like to be able to have something stable with another guy not so focused on sex.
Q: OK, I understand. Most guys don't really think about 'why' they do things sexually, they just take the easiest path to the orgasm.
A: That's what it's all about.
Q: So now let me ask you, were you born sexually attracted to men?
A: Well, I know I was born attracted to men, but I don't really know when I became sexually attracted to men.
Q: Do you think it could have something to do with all the porn, gay sex sites and masturbation.
A: Now that's funny, because now I just don't know. It's like did the chicken come before the egg.
Q: Exactly. Or like not being able to see the forest for the trees. You have been so focused on the porn and masturbation so long, you forget that this wasn't how you always felt.
A: Yeah, you just get stuck in a pattern, doing what you did because it felt good.
Q: Do you want to try an experiment with yourself?
A: It all depends on what it is.
Q: Go 10 Days without any porn, sex sites, no gym, no mens workout magazines, no masturbating to see if you can do it, and then to see how you really feel about your intense sexual attraction for masculine and more muscular men after that. Think you can do it?
A: I can do that, but I know it's gonna be hard to stop masturbating cold turkey, but I can give it a try.
Q: OK, just go to my blog: http://underthegayumbrella.blogspot.com/ and look in the archive for the post "10 Day Sex Detox Challenge". Read over the post and follow the 10 rules of the challenge. Then post your results on that blog posted during the 10 days, or when you are done.
A: OK, I can do that, but don't know about putting my stuff on the web
Q: Oh, you can post anonymously, and give as much detail as you want, maybe what day you are on, and how you are feeling about the challenge and yourself along the way.
A: That's cool, I can do that.
Q: Alright guy, so when are you gonna start.....tomorrow?
A: Well, I guess tomorrow is as good as any day.
Q: Alright then, good luck!
A: Thanks man...
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