Are You Trapped Under The Gay Umbrella?

A large percentage of males who either commit to being gay, or are bisexual who participate in only the sex aspect of the gay lifestyle, feel trapped.

The hardest thing for many 'gay' males to overcome is the fact that they have done so much sexually, that was justified by 'being gay', it's hard to climb out from under the gay umbrella.

Choosing to belong to the gay group has it's costs:

1. Without going into graphic detail, many of the sex acts performed on a regular basis, leaves the gay male outside the scope of acceptability for anyone outside his gay group, and many other males within the gay group.

2. He has had sexual activity with so many people, he consistently runs into a member of the gay group that he has had sex with.

3. He has had to reject his own basic morals and values to join the gay group.

4. To re-established those very basic morals and values, he must critically re-evaluate his own sexual behavior.

5. He will be challenged to establish an identity not based on sexual desire and sexual activity.

6. He has the challenge to take ownership of responsibility expectations in our society, where as a member of the gay group, there were no expectations at all.

7. He can no longer hide in a subculture or micro-community where his sexual obsessions/addictions are accepted.

8. He has no excuse left not to re-establish relationships with his family members who rejected his membership in the gay group.

9. He is challenged to be able to establish friendships with other males, without the restriction that they be a potential sex option.

10. Now he must be able to answer the question...."If you are not gay, who are you?"

So for the Biological Intersex/Bisexual Male who is making the effort to regain his own identity as a man, the disconnect from the gay group or the sexual and body image obsession associated with that group, will not be an easy one.

It's an opportunity to renew your life.

This is a personal journey for each individual, and each males' challenges will be different. But you just have to ask yourself a few questions to see if all the effort is worth it:

1. How has 'being' gay worked out for you over the past years?

2. How has a life obsessed with sexual activity worked out for you?

3. How has a life obsessed with masculinity and body image obsessions working for you?

4. How has the first three questions helped you obtain and maintain trusting friendships?

5. How has the first 4 questions helped you obtain and maintain a trusting and monogamous relationship with another person?

6. How do you think the answers to the first 5 questions, will have an impact on your future?

It's a New Year, and just maybe it's time give yourself an opportunity for the life you deserve.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!